


and now I just sit in Silence

by lance_alt



Series: Little Demuses AU [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Bad Ending, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Sick Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:09:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21694072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lance_alt/pseuds/lance_alt
Summary: following chapter 98R4 feels sick and Jaja helps him with this flu. But maybe it's something more serious...
Relationships: (one is jaja tho so not really an oc), Deceit Sanders & Original Character(s), Original Character & Original Character
Series: Little Demuses AU [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1545991
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	and now I just sit in Silence

**Author's Note:**

> for this fic i got a lot of help! i was randomly talking about LDAU with @purp-man and there was something they said that made me have this idea + i decided to use a theory @mylifeisadeceit told me they had, some time ago + me and @jajathelivingmeme starting this as a roleplay but for various problems had to stop. i rewrote it but still used some bits here and there of our roleplay  
and the ts italian gang also helped with some doubts i had
> 
> title from Car Radio by Twenty øne Piløts
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> warnings: death
> 
> on tumblr: https://lance-alt.tumblr.com/post/615557309157031936/and-now-i-just-sit-in-silence-words-2138

"And then the princess untied her long hair to heal the wounded thief," said Jaja, curled up on the sofa in her living room, with R4 next to her and a book in her hand. The fire crackled on the dry wood that had been deposited in the stove.

It was a rainy morning, and the drops ticked monotonously on the window panes, covered by curtains and sometimes interrupted by some impetuous thunder. The "house" they were in could also be called her Imagination, since she didn't want to risk anything by making him stay in the real world for the moment.

R4 giggled at her mom, "Is it weird if I imagined the princess as my brother R1?"

"Does he also have hair twenty meters long?" Jaja asked, turning to him

"Ehm... No", he chuckled again, "That seemed to be more of R11's goal, though!"

Jaja chuckled. "Your brothers seem really funny"

The kid beamed with a smile, "They are! They're all so great and we are all so different but we still love each other despite everything!". Jaja was smiling at him, "That's so cute!"

"Oh, I'm going to get you a drawing I made of them!!", He stood up in a flash, "You'll know what I meant with R1- ", suddenly, the child felt a dizziness and found himself falling on the ground.

"R4 -?" Jaja threw the book on the sofa and knelt down. "R4, can you hear me? Are you okay? -"

He held his head with his hand, and tried to get up. "I- I don't know", he coughed, "Maybe I stood up too fast"

"How do you feel? Are you hurt?" She positioned herself in front of him, putting her hands on his shoulders and looking at his face.

He was struggling to get up, "I- " he coughed again. "Is this a flu?"

"I...don't know. Has this ever happened before?"  
She took his hand, helping him sit up.

He felt so tired right then and decided to lay down on it. "No? I- ", he coughed again, "I feel like I'm burning"

"...come. I'll take you to bed" She grabbed R4 in his arms, squeezing him "Everything will be fine"

He hugged her tight, feeling pain in all his body and tried to hold the groan that wanted to escape from his mouth.

He found himself on his bed, Jaja covering his shaking body with a blanket. She promised her coming back and went to get something for the flu in another room.

She was going to make her best to make him feel better. She let the boy sleep, kissing him on the forehead and watching from his room's desk to keep him in check.

The adoptive mother seemed to notice how still he looked like that -maybe it was because he wasn't a real person. She didn't stare at his son sleeping, so why should she know if it were a normal thing?

Right then it had just been 7 PM. The boy was sure sleeping a lot, but the flu did that, she reminded herself. Jaja was only worried.

Hours had passed so she decided it was time to make him take the medicine. When the mother touched the little boy's forehead again, she had to pull it away from how much it burned.

She shook him a little to wake him up- but she couldn't help thinking him being so still- No! She couldn't think like that!

He finally slowly opened his eyes, a little confused- he was probably dreaming. "Sweetie,", she whispered with a tender voice, so to not increase a possible headache he might have, "it's time to take the medicine".

Jaja grabbed the syrup on the bedside table, while the kid got in a sitting position, and filled the spoon with it. R4 went to grab it but it fell down, getting his clothes wet. "Oh it's okay! I'm going to take some tissue", she said while going to grab some.

That was weird though, he was sure he had grabbed the spoon in hand. The flu was a weird thing, he guessed. He was going to forget about it, but then he saw how his left hand was fading- he could say-, he could see though it.

His mom came in with some tissue. "M-Mom?", came a shaken call from the ill boy. She immediatly realized why he used that tone and run towards him in a flash.

What was going on? Was it normal? R4 couldn't be playing a prank to her like that, she knew he wasn't the type.

"Honey, explain what is going", she went to ask calmy, but worried. "I- I don't know! I- M-My- My hand just- ", he started coughing hard.

"I'm going to take you to Deceit, okay? He would know what's happening". From what she got, she needed Deceit or Remus' consent -so to say- to get to them, though. She was no Thomas Sanders, she couldn't just think about the Mindscape and get teleported. So, it seemed like she couldn't actually do anything to bring his boy back. Unless... 

"R4, can you take us to your family?", she was hoping he could! The situation was an emergency!

The child closed his eyes, taking his mom's hand in his, and focused, hoping he was capable to take them there -he was part of Thomas, after all.

Nothing. But Jaja couldn't give up, she thought while noticing the little version of Remus got back to coughing. She couldn't let him try like that, it could be hurting him, "R- ", she got interrupted, "No- No, I can do this", he forced out, and tried to focus again. 

Something happened that second time, though. That something had just fallen on his side, on the bed. It was a phone.

Rem4 didn't know he could conjure things like his dad did, and that discovery made him a little happy to have something in common with his hero, but it wasn't the time to be a fanboy.

Jaja had already went to grab it, "Will this allow us to talk to your parents?", she couldn't help a hopeful smile appearing after the thought hit her. "I... Maybe?", he shamefully shrugged.

She took it to her ear, thinking that maybe there was no need to diale a number she didn't even know about. "Remus, Dee?", she tried to ask in the silence of the other side, without taking her eyes off R4.

"Who is it?", a serious but yet young voice replied. "I- I'm Jaja. Are you one of R4's brothers?", Jaja asked, shaking a bit.

The other sighed. "Yeah, let's put it like that", then repeated more sternly, "Who are you?"

"I'm Jaja, R4's mom...are Remus or Deceit there?"

Some pause. "Hold on", various noises and some distant talking could be heard. "Yes?", that one was definitely Deceit.

Jaja sighed with relief "Deceit? I think we got a problem."

"A problem?! With my- ", he cleared his throath and calmly asked "What is it?"

"...he..."Jaja looked at R4 before she spoke again. "... is disappearing"

"Come here! Now! Both of you!", the call ended.

She picked up R4, who was still shaking. He was keeping himself silent. Only tightening the grip on his mom, every so often.

"... everything will be fine. We'll fix everything."

He was still coughing, and harder too. More parts were starting to disappear.

She let a few seconds pass -because they needed to focus and give the consent to come in-, then both of them closed their eyes.

R4's cough came back hard and, upon opening her eyes to check on him, she noticed they had arrived to their destination.

She sighed with relief as she saw the snake in front of her. After all, he was his father, wasn't he? He knew what to do. He had to know what to do.

"What happened?", Deceit asked as calm as he could.

R11 rushed in the scene too, followed by all the others.

"He started shaking, and then his hand became transparent!..tell me you know what to do. Please"

Jaja gently handed R4 to Deceit, taking a few steps back.

Everyone was silent then. The snake man taking R4 and putting him on the couch. Remus handed him blankets he just conjured and Dee put them on the boy.

"You don't know anything else?", he asked, not daring gazing away from his figure.

"... no" Jaja shook her head disconsolately.

"They're not Sides", Remus remembered them," And he has been away from Thomas for too long". "For exactly one month", added R11. "Yeah. And maybe that is what is happening"

Deceit raised his voice "And what exactly is happening? Could you explain?!"

Remus seemed hesitant to respond

"... you can help him, right?" Jaja asked, fearing the answer.

"I think him staying here will do the trick!", he declared happily. "So it's okay"

Jaja dropped onto the sofa next to R4 with a sigh of relief. "... I was so scared..."

"We just have to treat it like a normal flu", he kept saying with no worry

"And then...he can go home with me, right?.."

"Oh, ehm... See, the problem was the fact he was away from his host, so... "

"...so?"

"So, it means you can no longer play 'mommy' with the kid!"

"Oh... ", Jaja turned to her child, worried for his health.

"You can go". What?! She turned to Remus, incredulously. "What? You did your part. The kid is not yours and this is your fault", he said with nonchalance. "Do I have to look angry too, to make you understand I'm being serious?"

"..."

"Just go", added Deceit, not even looking at her. "I'm not mad at you, but I can't look at you right now"

She took a deep breath. "Fine", she replied with a little shake in her voice, "Just let me know if he gets better. And I am always there to help him"

"Whatever", Remus snapped his fingers and Jaja was back to her place.

R4 had witnessed the scene. "M- Mom?". Dee had to admit hearing him saying that had stung a little.

He pushed the thought away. "Will him just staying here suffice?"

At the absence of a response, he yelled "Remus!", "Alright, alright. I was just thinking... Yeah."

"Remus- ", "I don't know, okay? This might be as serious as it seems or maybe not! I don't know!"

"What?! Then- ", "Don't worry, if anything, I could just make another one"

"Wha- ", "Or maybe not... Maybe that would create another little Rem, but not R4. It wouldn't be him with amnesia, but it would just be... another little Rem. Completely a new one"

All kept quite.

"Everyone, go away. I will take care of him on my own for now", Deceit left no room for argument on that.

So, all of them left the two alone -Remus included.

Dee had managed to make the kid sleep, shushing his worries.

In that case too, hours had passed. The snake man checking his temperature -it was too hot-, preparing medicines for later. And no one dared to disturb them -even though there was some of them who were looking over from afar, every once in a while.

It was dinner time, so he couldn't stop the others being in the zone -they were still keeping away, though. Yes, he should go eat too. No, he was not going to.

He could have been found with R4's hand in his, taken in a tight grip, but Dee really couldn't say that, since all the arm was gone too. He was fearing the worst could really happen. And he would have no power to stop it.

Wasn't the child being too still? He went to touch him but his hand passed through the boy, but it seemed that gesture had caused his figure to vanish even more. He could be barely seen!

He wanted to scream and get the others there, but he couldn't find his voice. Touching him again could make him disappear for good too, maybe! Deceit was shaking in fear. It- It couldn't be really happening... Please!

With some little voice he had managed to get out of his mouth, he called for R4 -voice shaking-, hoping that wouldn't make the situation worse like when he touched him last time.

Deceit felt himself smiling -and crying too- at seeing the kid slowly opening his eyes.

No, why was he closing them again?! Please, he had to open them again!

Dee tried to get the tears away, to stop them from blurring his vision. But then he saw... 

The little version of Remus had disappeared in a second in front of his eyes.

N- No... Please, no... 

He slowly inspected the couch, and -scared- tried to touch it too. Nothing.

Please, it could not be real.

Please... 

**Author's Note:**

> wow, this is the first fic that required so much time to write  
let me know what you think of it. comments are good food😋  
and if you could help me with the tags i would be grateful
> 
> on tumblr: https://lance-alt.tumblr.com/post/615557309157031936/and-now-i-just-sit-in-silence-words-2138


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